Wanna Really Love?

To Your Independence

ImageThe people I love the deepest and the truest all have something in common:  a fierce independence that finds its center in god and the soul. 

They all hold in common that the arbiter of their actions is not located out in the world, but in a deep and personal connection to inner guidance and listening to a greater intelligence navigating their lives.  Of course, this means that there is absolutely nothing I can do to control them.  It’s impossible for such people to be fully themselves in the context of control.  They navigate by an authority that is divine, human and entirely emergent through their own listening.  It’s terrifying to love such a person – because one never knows what they will decide or what God will decide for them.  But, it is this kind of love that shows us what love really is, not on romantic human terms, but on the terms the universe offers us to understand what life and love and consciousness really are.

To love such a person is to really love, to love unconditionally, to love as an art of setting another free.

In my experience, this unconditionality is both a prerequisite to and an ongoing foundational practice within any relationship that “works”.  It’s not easy.  It’s the hardest thing, and the most beautiful thing.  The pleasure it offers is it’s own reward.  But, that doesn’t mean it’s easy.  It’s just that, if you want a  relationship that is really honest and true, courageous and surrendered, and authentic to your soul, it’s the only way to go.  It’s the only path to soul level, sustained intimacy, whether with a lover, a friend, a child, a parent or a colleague.  Unconditional love empowers each person to be wholly themselves.  It supports each person to engage the other and the relationship itself (which  is a third intelligence) from what is truly present rather than from what is past or what is projected into the future.

It takes a lot of maturity, softness and courage to create a relationship that lives in the present moment – a lot – because you don’t get to lean on future guarantees or projections based in past experience.  You don’t get to create contracts to control each other or keep the other safe from experiences projected into the relationship from the past or onto the future because the past was scary. Rather, you operate from a primary contract to protect and uphold each others’ liberation.  You get to gather yourselves into the present moment continuously as you do the healing work that inevitably comes up around the past and around what shows up on the path of your relating in the present.

This is the only true union –  a moment by moment dissolution into love, honesty, co-creation, trust, presence, vulnerability and all the pleasure, pain, wonder, stillness, inspiration, awareness and responsibility that arises when we give ourselves totally. 

Why would we do this?  Simply because we can.  Simply because we are given to do so.  Simply because we need each other in order to truly know what it is to be free.

Imagine

Ceaseless fascination with the songs of light, the turning of seasons, and the camera's invitation to co-create with the eye of god.

Ceaseless fascination with the songs of light, the turning of seasons, and the camera’s invitation to co-create with the eye of god.  photo:  ss

Hey Friend,

This is an invitation to pause.

Imagine, just for a few minutes, the world you really want to live in – the one Yoko and John showed us, the one where you get to romp in the grass everyday, where the sun warms your skin, where your body is radiantly healthy, where everyone dances regularly, and where our parents  and children and partners and lovers and neighbors are true friends.

Bring in the color.  Tune up the sound.  Make a smell symphony.  Melt into it… just for a minute, let yourself have the world you imagine.

Where are you?  Perhaps it is the home you never fully let yourself dream of, the relationship you thought was impossible, the business they said would fail.  Or, perhaps it is the healing practice they said wasn’t valuable, or the art that nobody listened to, or the the silence you thought you needed to cover in order to be heard…

Go there.  Extend the instant.  Extend the interval.  That is where your real power lies – right there – in the center of your imagination.  That’s god power at work.  Don’t let it die.

What can you imagine into existence?

“BUT…” you say, “I’m not sure I deserve this.  I’m not sure it’s possible.  I won’t be supported.  What if I die?”

Imagine, just for this moment, that the universe loves you, that every single thing that has ever happened to you, is happening to you, or will ever happening to you, is perfectly aligned with your soul’s plan for itself and god’s plan for you.   Just let that in.  And, just for today, take another few steps into LIVING INTO the world you imagine.

 

Two(+) keys for today:

Give the world the benefit of the doubt. 

‘Notice whether you imagine (project) good intentions or negative intentions onto the actions or others.  Withdraw the judgement and simply imagine that that person or situation is doing it’s very very best to come to a higher order of resolution with challenge or change.  Notice how this is profoundly relieving for you, because then you are no longer carrying the weight of that judgement.  Repeat… notice.  Find a more charged situation.  Do it again.

Imagine new life where you currently perceive dysfunction or death.

We all have those things we look away from because they are unpleasant, or deadened places within our selves or our world.  Often, we don’t know what to do about them, so we ignore them, or simply cope with them.   Examples:  the knee issue you’ve been nursing for two years but “have just gotten used to living with,” the homeless person whose particular energy and presence speaks mysteriously to you, but who you’ve never said “hi” to, the bare rooftops I’m looking at right now, that I imagine everyday as gardens, solar catchers and water movers.  Every single thing you see that tugs at your body, heart and soul for an authentic response is an opportunity in latent form.  These things invite you to apply your imagination to co-create a higher octave of being, of response, of solution or resolution or connection in your own life and in the world.  Where in your life are you ignoring a potent opportunity to turn towards a challenge or a pain with creative openness to grow, to give and to be changed?  Where are you pushing something away because it doesn’t fit your preferences or fantasy image of your life?  Choose one thing or situation.  Imagine it as a part of the world you want to see – with your heart wide open – and see what new responses arise.

Bonus Key:

“Better Than Imagined”

For me, the most potent key (or prayer) is the one where I use my imagination to conjure and coalesce the most beautiful, elegant, lovingly created thing (like Dancing Freedom, for example, or the organic feast I cooked on Saturday night), then I GIVE IT UP TO GOD, trusting that’s the Greater Intelligence of creation is a more brilliant, diverse, genius co-creator than me alone.  This is where true magic happens.  All you need to do is to allow yourself to engage a dialogue, a conversation, with whatever you perceive that larger intelligence and love to be.  Just try it – dance it, talk it, meditate it, use your gratitude power to engage with it.  See what happens.

More on imagination, creativity and liberation next week…

I love you so much,

Samantha